Terrorist Alert.

Akpos went to Abuja to see his uncle.
He got to his uncle’s office as early as 8am but the secretary told him to return by 2pm ”that Oga is not around”.
So, Akpos had to hang around till 2pm.
By 1pm, hunger was beginning ”to show Akpos pepper”. He had not eaten all day and had only N200 in his pocket. There was neither a fast food nor a ”bukka” around only fancy hotels.
Akpos began to feel dizzy so he formulated a solution. He looked around and saw a fantastic 5 star hotel. He adjusted his clothes, cleaned his dusty shoe, wiped his oily face with his handkercheif and walked into the hotel with confidence.
In d lobby, the receptionist at the front desk asked; are u here to see somebody or do you want to lodge? Akpos said confidently “lodging!”.
The hotel receptionist said; the cheapest room here is N47k per night.
Akpos: “no problem dis place is lovely, just like the hotel I slept yesterday in Dubai on my way from the United states.
Receptionist said “thank you sir”.

Akpos said: But can I pay in hard currency as I have not changed my dollars?
Receptionist: No problem sir
Akpos: but first, where is your restaurant I want to eat before I go up to
the room.
They showed Akpos to the restaurant and told the chef to treat him well cos he was a new customer that just came back from US! The chef welcomed him and gave him the menu.

Akpos first ordered appetizer, 2 bowls of assorted pepper soup with a bottle of red spanish wine. Total cost N18k.
Next for the main meal, Akpos ordered pounded yam, efo riro with snail and catfish costing N15k.
Akpos’ total bill was now was N33K but Akpos had only N200.
They cleared his empty plates away and brought the bill.

Akpos began to sweat even inside an air conditioned room. The waiter came twice to the table, Akpos waved him away saying he was still relaxing after the heavy meal.
The staff began to suspect Akpos, of not having money, they called the security and stood round him. Akpos looked at all of them quietly, then he brought out one his phones and used it to dial another one in his pocket which was on silent mode.

Akpos (on the phone): Ehen, is it time? Yes na, the bomb is still with me not yet exploded……..In 2 minutes? Of course, no problem, I will detonate it on time. I‘m proud to be the chosen suicide bomber, and there are many people where I am, so the impact will be very great. Yes oh Government will have no choice but to listen to our cause now.

Before Akpos even dropped the phone, the restaurant had cleared out.
As he walked out of the restaurant, nobody was in the lobby. Even the street
was empty.

Ok, that was a Joke. A lesson nonetheless. Terrorism helps no one, your life is a gift, live it maximumly and don’t get carried away by doctrines that can cause loss of lives.

How una dey? I say eh no go good if I no write something today. At all at all na witch, na so dem dey talk am for local man language where I come from which is Nigeria.

Keep Following my @surrogatetwins journey on Instagram, I update it regularly.

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